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Jennifer McDougall
Jennifer McDougall

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Published in Doctor Funny

·4 days ago

They Put a Gun to My Head and Told Me To Write

And this is what I’m writing — THEY ordered me to write. “Write. Something. Anything. Or we shoot,” THEY declared in Gangsta voices, with one gun to my temple and the other aimed straight at my ovaries. Which are useless and dried up but still fun to have. I can’t say who THEY are. I’m terrified. I…

Utter Bollocks

2 min read

They Put a Gun to My Head and Told Me To Write
They Put a Gun to My Head and Told Me To Write
Utter Bollocks

2 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Mar 8

What S.M.U.T. Means to Me

A response to Laurel B. Miller’s prompt — Before I was a Brownie or a Girl Guide I wore a Pepto Bismol mumu and called myself a Spark. Then this wise ole woman named Brown Owl — who liberally sprinkled her fist-sized cupcakes with Zoloft — sat me on a toadstool and officially declared me an Ember.* *This…

Smut

2 min read

What S.M.U.T. Means to Me
What S.M.U.T. Means to Me
Smut

2 min read


Published in Know Thyself, Heal Thyself

·Mar 3

Quit Whining and Be Grateful

I take so much for granted — This morning I totaled my car. Yes, the one that I bought with only my womanly signature. The very same 7-month-old VW that I drove most of the way across Canada. It survived a logging road with ruts big enough to swallow an RV. It befriended ferry terminal staff and…

Gratitude

2 min read

Quit Whining and Be Grateful
Quit Whining and Be Grateful
Gratitude

2 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Feb 23

Unsplash’s Sense of Mismatch Photo Humour

Oxymorons in the world of free photos — We’re all oxymorons. Okay, we’re all morons — with oxymoronic tendencies. So I’m not surprised that Unsplash is as human as the rest of us. Here are some of the mismatches I found on Unsplash. Maybe you’ve found even better ones? Funeral Remember hearing classmates singing, “Buck and Bambi-Joe sitting in…

Oxymoron

3 min read

Unsplash’s Sense of Mismatch Photo Humour
Unsplash’s Sense of Mismatch Photo Humour
Oxymoron

3 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Feb 15

Doctor Funny Humpday Checkup

February 15, 2023 — Dearest Comrades in the ̶m̶e̶n̶t̶a̶l̶ medical ward, Happy belated St. Valentine’s Day. I hope the one who makes all the parts of you flutter gave you enough chocolate to slay a whole pack of dingos. May whatever you received or bought for yourself be better than my daughter’s gift to…

Newsletter

2 min read

Doctor Funny Humpday Checkup
Doctor Funny Humpday Checkup
Newsletter

2 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Feb 11

Unrequited Love in the Elevator

All these years I thought it was only me who remembered — Adam Robinson showed us some of his top-secret love letters. This inspired Oscar Rhea to expose one of the steamy ones he had penned in his younger years. Little did anyone know that his previously clandestine message would reunite lovebirds. You know what Jeffrey Epstein maintained — “love always wins.” …

Writing Prompt Response

3 min read

Unrequited Love in the Elevator
Unrequited Love in the Elevator
Writing Prompt Response

3 min read


Published in The Haven

·Feb 10

A Listicle of New Curse Words from Readers of a Curse Word Listicle

Say that fast 10 times — My article about swear words released a torrent. Okay, torrent may be a slight exaggeration. Five is a big number, right? Anyways, offered forth was a host of alternative words to use when you drop something on the floor. Or stub your toe on a jackhammer. Or piss yourself. …

Swear Words

2 min read

A Listicle of New Curse Words from Readers of a Curse Word Listicle
A Listicle of New Curse Words from Readers of a Curse Word Listicle
Swear Words

2 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Feb 8

When Part of the Trinity Doesn’t Show Up We All Suffer

Ghosting for the church is hard work — I’m probably going to Hell for this one. Well, for that and a few other reasons. I won’t get into the nitty-gritty at the moment. My parole officer hasn’t given me the all-clear. BichoDoMato prompted and I’m answering. He offered a number of images and instructed us to “go ahead…

Writing Prompt Response

4 min read

When Part of the Trinity Doesn’t Show Up We All Suffer
When Part of the Trinity Doesn’t Show Up We All Suffer
Writing Prompt Response

4 min read


Published in Doctor Funny

·Feb 7

The Chinese Spy Balloon That Came in From the Canadian Cold

Not everything is made in China — Dear American Government, Thank you for once again trusting that your northern neighbour — yes, with a U — is too stupid to conceive of, and release, a spy balloon. Go ahead, blame China. We don’t mind. We can appreciate that there’s been “issues” since we did your dirty work…

Spy Balloon

2 min read

The Chinese Spy Balloon That Came in From the Canadian Cold
The Chinese Spy Balloon That Came in From the Canadian Cold
Spy Balloon

2 min read


Published in New Choices

·Updated Feb 6

Hey Weirdo, the World Needs You

We needed these 3 famous freaks & we need your strange too — “Being different and thinking different makes a person unforgettable. History does not remember the forgettable.” Suzy Kassem Being different takes guts. Our society expects us to fit in, all be the same, and go through life like little discipline-coated soldiers in a never-meandering row. If you’ve ever been called a…

Weird

4 min read

Hey Weirdo, the World Needs You
Hey Weirdo, the World Needs You
Weird

4 min read

Jennifer McDougall

Jennifer McDougall

1.8K Followers

Attempting Serious and Satire... Sometimes successful. Editor, Doctor Funny.

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